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Showing posts from May, 2012

"OASIS GIVES YOU RICKETS" - offcuts/notes from The Enemy review.

Luke Turner & John Doran at the Quietus are two of the best editors I've ever worked for: my Enemy review for them was way way way too long and Luke did a great job cutting the shit and keeping the flow (you can read the version on the Quietus here). These are just what the post-title says, offcuts and notes that didn't make the cut (thank fuck, but what else are blogs for other than putting stuff that won't sit anywhere else?). 
OK, first a review for the Enemy fans. Hi guys. No, don’t come any closer, I don’t want your .  . . . particles in my breathing space, no I won’t shake hands thanks I’ve just showered. OK, ready? Oh you'll fkn love it mate. It's quality. It's class. It's mint, both kinds, spear and pepper and it will provide a TOP soundtrack to a HENCH night out, a QUALITY night out that's pure CLASS and totally FOOKIN (why do you speak like that? People from Manchester don’t actually speak like that y’know?) MINT. Five stars. Enemy album o…

A New List From The NME, and some thoughts about pop-hackery.

If you want to feel awful homicidal awful quick click here, read this, and then read the comments.

It's not the actual list that's the problem. The list is the usual mix of shit, shinola and gold you'd expect. Terribly predictable no.1 but hey-ho. The problem is the writing & subbing of the text for each track. I mean, these are meant to be the greatest songs of their generation - does the writing communicate that sense of importance? Does the writing make you feel as excited, as bound up,  as 'Caught Out There', 'Around The World', 'Glory Box' or 'Unfinished Sympathy' do? In fact - good example, let's check out what's said about no.31, 'Unfinished Sympathy' a record that shudders like an iceberg through your heart, always swells like a fresh new bruise, the turning of personal torment, of the battle between freedom and love, fearlessness & loneliness into a whole new universal noir. It's a record you never forge…

"A hoax perpetrated on the public"

Neil Kulkarni , August 19th, 2009, The Quietus

80 quid? Fucking hell, I must've been wrong about this one — see, I had this down as a wet steaming fart of fuck-all when it came out but 80 quid? Jeezus, it must be good, no, it must be postively crammed forth with pan-roasted goodness n'est ce pas? Sure, your reflex is to run, but maybe it's like the Smiths and if you scratch the surface (hold your noses) and forget your prejudice you'll find some men making heaven. I mean, 80, eight-zero not one-eight quid. 80 quid. This crock's gotta have some fucking gold inside to warrant such elitist pricing.

Let's crunch the numbers. Two CDs (one of the album, one of bootlegs you'll already have if you're in any way fussed enough), one live DVD, innumerable bits of paper, a few bits of vinyl, 80-squids. Your funeral pal, and I hope it is soon y'rich cunt. But let's get to the really big numbers, the important ones.

1989 — Unbelievab…

"I DON'T love music more than anything else"

I wrote about Cats On Fire for the Guardian here

And when I say 'European Album Of The Year' I mean it. Get. Now. 

 Here's what I thought of their last album, the beautiful 'Our Temperance Movement', as run by The Quietus  in 2009 . I love love love this band and I love the Quietus for letting me 'go long' on this stuff.  

Cats On Fire  Our Temperance Movement  Matinee Recordings
 Edith fucking Bowman, how shit is guitar music right now​? No wonder those off-the-peg indie-duds H&M and Topman are making such a killing with are in such infant-sizes – indie-fans must be fucking starving, malnourished, Biafran on these rations, these crumbs in the dust. 14 years ago I wrote this about indie-rock nearly-rans Sleeper- “Indie is four people getting together wanting to create something sublime and immortal having had their lives swallowed by pop and needing to do the same, surveying the infinite possibilities and deciding three guitars some drums and some good song…